Well, I had a big response from my family regarding my last blog. I can see their worry and the fact that they are very concerned with my health. If I didn't want to be accountable for myself,then I wouldn't have blogged. I know they love me and want only the best for me,but right now I just need support rather than lectures. I know that I have slipped back into an unhealthy habit,I also know that the more I eat the more my body will deteriorate.
I think that the biggest revelation in all of this is that I have to watch what I eat forever. I just can't loose weight for a certain time period. I have to always be careful. Thats sort of overwhelming. Forever.... Thats a huge time frame.
My friends just don't understand. Their  not slim by any means themselves, but they always bring food over,eat out almost every meal and can't understand why I can't go out for  burger or a beer. I can't beleive that they are not diabetics.
I actually fooled myself into thinking that if I stayed active,walked or did cardio work everyday then it would be fine if I ate what I wanted to.
Nope. These are hard lessons to learn especially coming from a binge eater.
I know that I am not going to get a favorable report from my doctor this coming September. I go and get my blood work in the middle of August. Thats a consequence.
I do want to get married,be healthy and happy. It's just hard when I'm dissappointed with myself then to  hear it all again from other people.
I just have to pick myself up again and go on.